


You Were in my Dreams

by MonsterBoyf



Category: VIXX
Genre: Alternate Universe - 1940s, Cuddles, Dry Humping, First time with a man, Hand Jobs, Hongbin Gay awakening, Hongbin angsty, Idk im gonna say thoughts of infidelity, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Post-Divorce, Surgeon Hongbin, This is just a fetishization of Hakyeon's masculinity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-21
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-03-13 05:22:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28898094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MonsterBoyf/pseuds/MonsterBoyf
Summary: Hongbin's wife left him, and his apprentice, Hakyeon, makes a visit to try and comfort him.
Relationships: Cha Hakyeon | N/Lee Hongbin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 13





	You Were in my Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> This is the chabin from Healing touch, my ww2 hospital au. Itll make more sense with that context but can be read alone. 
> 
> Why write the healing touch people actually want when you can write nbin gay awakening?

"Hi Hongbin." Hakyeon stood on the surgeon's doorstep, trying to grace him with a smile. Hongbin blinked at him, looking at him and then the containers under his arm. "They're for you. I thought it might help to have something you dont have to worry about actually making."

"Thank you." Hongbin stepped back, giving Hakyeon the room to come into the house. He did, stepping out of his shoes once he was on the doormat. His surcoat had soft grey fur on the collar. The coat was only zipped halfway, showing his baby blue shirt underneath. Hongbin stuck his hands out in a jerky motion, silently asking for the bowls. "Please, get comfortable." Hakyeon chuckled in this odd sort of way as he handed over the food. He took off the coat, looking much more slim without it. The way his shirt was tucked, he looked like he had such a thin waist. He rested his coat on his arm.

"You don't have to host me if you're not in the right mind for it." Hongbin shook his head, walking on to his kitchen. 

For the first time, he felt embarrassed by his house. How much everything reeked of her, in a metaphorical sense. She hosted, she decorated. He felt ashamed that Hakyeon had to see it. He wanted to clean the walls bare at every glance Hakyeon threw. 

"You've kept rather clean," Hakyeon noted. 

"I don't get destructive, if that's what you were expecting." Hongbin put the food in the fridge, grimacing at its barrenness. Fortunately, Hakyeon wasn't looking. 

"No, I simply- breakups end in me not cleaning for some time, for me at least. I suppose I can't expect that of everyone."

"Have you had many?" Hongbin felt a little jolt go through him at asking that, like he was doing something bad asking. Hakyeon laughed, filling the house with its noise.

"A few, yes."

"I've only had one, before now."

"Not very interested in romance?" Hakyeon raised a brow and Hongbin licked his lips before shaking his head. 

"No. I'm not usually the one to pursue things." Hakyeon's smile was tender.

"I would have expected differently. You're very outgoing at the hospital."

"I'm domineering, it's different. And surgery is very different from relationships."

"Yes, you're right," Hakyeon said and looked away, examining the living room he stood in. 

"Do you want something to drink?"

"Water would be just fine." He didn't turn his eyes back on Hongbin and it made his skin itch. He didn't want his eyes on all of his wife's facets. He got two glasses and brought them to the coffee table. He let out a breath watching Hakyeon place two coasters before looking at Hongbin with a polite smile and a gesture to the table. Hongbin placed them down, but didn't sit. They stood beside each other, silent for a moment.

"Do you want to stay in this house? After everything?" Hongbin nodded with his head ducked. 

"Yes, yes I'm going to stay. There's only one bedroom. We were already living comfortably when it was the two of us. I shouldn't have to worry." Hakyeon nodded. 

"That's good. If you ever need any help with it, you can call me." 

"You're very concerned for my well being." Hongbin didn't mean it so sharply, so pointedly. Perhaps he was venting his frustration with his own thoughts, at Hakyeon's consideration. Hakyeon just chuckled again. 

"Yes, but it's only because I care. It's a difficult time where you can feel very lonely." Hongbin couldn't say he was wrong. The house was so quiet at night. Everything was always so still. Every room he moved to felt like it had this kind of air inside, shaking with unaddressed talks that would forever be left unsaid. When he laid in his bed at night, the loneliness caught up and filled his mind with thoughts of company. Was he still ashamed of that?

"You're a very good man, Hakyeon," Hongbin spoke as he sat on the couch, taking an uneasy sip of his glass. Hakyeon sat with him. He did it so delicately. He was always so slight and delicate. He crossed his legs at the knee and rested his hands on them. 

"As are you." Hongbin sighed at that. He stared at the wall across from them. He couldn't stop remembering those thoughts now. Thoughts and dreams. He never told his wife, but if he did, would it have changed anything? Would she have run away faster? Could she smell it on his spirit before she left? A disgusting feeling settled itself in Hongbin's chest. Hakyeon put a hand on his back, rubbing comfortingly. Hongbin mentally traced the path of his finger tips. They bumped over the points of his spine, the curve of his shoulder blade.

"In these breakups, did you start to think of things you never would?" Hakyeon made a face, growing concern. 

"I suppose… The end of a relationship can have a profound impact on your psyche." Hongbin nodded, taking another sip. "You're not thinking of anything violent, are you?" Hakyeon cautioned to ask.

"No. It's nothing like that." 

"Ah, good." There was a silence, stiff and awkward. Hongbin felt like something was pushing on his lungs, crushing his ribs. His skin was goose flesh however, reacting to Hakyeon's touch. 

"Did you ever… act on those thoughts?" Hakyeon's hand left. He was pulling away and Hongbin wanted so bad to pull him back in. He couldn't be alone. 

"For me, they were very jealous, petty things. I would never act on something like that."

"They were only like that?"

"Are you experiencing something different?" Hongbin rubbed his hands together, staring at his glass of water. Was he cursed if he saw it as half empty?

Hongbin rushed in before Hakyeon had time to react. He held Hakyeon's face in both of his dry hands. The kiss was harsher than anyone would ever want to receive. To call it a kiss was being generous towards Hongbin, more of just a smashing of two faces. Hakyeon let out a kind of muffled yelp, surprised but already silenced by the kiss. When Hakyeon put a hand to Hongbin's shoulder, he realized what he had done. He pulled away and looked at Hakyeon as he felt the hot shame roll over his body in a turbulent hurricane. Hakyeon was wide eyed, and when he let out a breath Hongbin could feel it on his skin. 

"I am so sorry…" Hakyeon gulped. 

"You've been considering men?" He was so quiet. Hongbin couldn't convince his body to let go of his apprentice. 

"No, just you."

"Before? Or after?" 

"Before. I thought- I thought it was a guilty conscience." Hakyeon stared at him, his eyes, his lips. Hongbin prayed the vulnerability in his own enacted some sympathy. Hakyeon reached up with a hesitant hand and grabbed Hongbin's shirt, pulling him in.

The kiss was softer now delicate. Hongbin was near tearful, grounding himself in focusing on the way Hakyeon's lips moved, how soft they were, how sweet he smelled. The shame wasn't for wanting it anymore, only taking without asking. He didn't feel ashamed for wanting it knowing how good it felt, tasted, smelled, how heavenly it was for every earthly sense. He dropped Hakyeon's face, instead holding onto his waist. It didn't curve back out. It was a straight line from his shoulders to his hips. He wasn't familiarly soft either. Hongbin's hands moved up his sides, trying to actualize how different he was. His chest was smooth and flat, his chest and shoulders were broader. He barely noticed Hakyeon pulling away from their kiss. Hongbin still had his eyes closed and his hands on Hakyeon. His breath was harsher than it should have been. 

"Hongbin…" 

"You're so much different."

"Hongbin, are you sure you want this?" Hongbin didn't answer. He leaned even further in, sticking his nose under Hakyeon's jaw. There was the sharp cutting smell of his aftershave. His skin was so smooth and soft though. Hongbin was drunk on Hakyeon. He impulsively tasted his skin. Hakyeon gave out a shaky little sound. Hongbin felt trancelike, completely lost to his wife's ugly decorating or the depressing house. The universe didn't exist past Hakyeon. His neck was so long, and his Adam's apple stuck out like an invitation. So many open mouth kisses across the extent of his neck. 

"Hongbin, if you keep going-"

"I want to." Another taste of his beautiful skin. "It's all I can think about." Further down now, in the space Hakyeon's undone buttons granted him. "I would think about you with her." It was in Hakyeon's swear that Hongbin realized how exhilarating that confession was. He didn't even tell himself that. Yet, now he had a taste of Hakyeon and he was spilling the worst secret he had. He whined at Hakyeon's tongue in his mouth. They didn't kiss like this. It made Hongbin want his tongue everywhere.

"I couldn't let her touch me, all I saw was you." It only felt better and better. The first time was exhilarating, this was addicting, especially with Hakyeon breathing like that and looking at Hongbin like that. He had sunk down, head practically on the arm rest. He pulled his fistful of Hongbin's shirt again. 

"Get on my lap." Hongbin sat down on Hakyeon's thighs. Spreading his own in order to do so made him realize how fitting his slacks had become, how aroused he was. Hakyeon was not coy in the way he looked at Hongbin, saw Hongbin's bulge pressing a form into one of the legs of his pants. Hongbin rocked his bottom half on Hakyeon, shivering from the sensation. "Again," Hakyeon ordered. He was so winded. His voice was so commanding and deep. It felt so,  _ so _ new. He didn't want someone begging for him anymore. He wanted a man, no, he wanted Hakyeon to make him be the beggar. Hongbin did as he was told, then covered his mouth to moan when Hakyeon thrusted up against him. "Was that good?" Hongbin violently nodded, eyes closed as shamelessly humped Hakyeon's lap. So good. Absolutely perfect. 

Hongbin was startled as he was lifted up, moved around. Hakyeon sat up now, still with Hongbin in his lap. Hongbin held the back of the couch on both hands, staring at Hakyeon as he fruitlessly tried to catch his breath. 

"Hakyeon," he moaned, despite the elder doing nothing more than grabbing Hongbin's hips and pushing them down. Hakyeon simpered, then pushed and pulled Hongbin's hips so that he was humping Hakyeon as harshly as he could. Hakyeon bounced his leg. Hongbin was shaking at this point, falling forward to drape his body over Hakyeon. He was practically moaning into his ear. 

"Is it how you dreamed, Hongbin?" Hakyeon said it so sweetly, as though it were an innocent dream and not one of getting fucked to the point of inability to walk. As though they weren't on Hongbin's couch, a week after his divorce, dry humping like God-fearing teenagers. 

"Yes, yes. Thank you-thank you so much."

"Is this enough for you to get off?" Hakyeon's nose was on the shell of Hongbin's ear, hard breaths making him twitch and shudder. Hakyeon's strong, masculine hands wrapped around him, forcing him down. Hongbin nodded, lost to words. There was wetness growing inside his pants. He moaned at Hakyeon releasing him, slipping his palms and long fingers into Hongbin's pants to hold his ass. 

"Hakyeon."

"Would you be able to stand doing anything bare?" 

"I'll die," Hongbin whined, making Hakyeon let out a huff of a laugh. He was twisted around Hakyeon's whim already. He was wet and hot and neither of them had even removed anything. To have Hakyeon under him-or on top of him- nude, touching him all over with bare skin, just visualizing it was overwhelming. 

"We'll wait for that, then." Hakyeon took a hand from Hongbin's ass and grabbed the back of his head, bringing him into a kiss. He didn't have the rational mind to close his eyes anymore. He just stared with lidded eyes and shaking vision as Hakyeon pushed his hot tongue in Hongbin's mouth, bounced his thigh under Hongbin. The remaining hand holding his ass left as well. It slid over Hongbin's hip, his thigh. Hongbin gasped, arched, when it settled on the bulge in his pant leg, began to rub up and down. Hongbin desperately tried to thrust up against his hand, gasping and struggling for words. 

"Hakyeon- hakyeon, fuck." Hakyeon opened his eyes, watching with Hongbin with such intensity he would have gotten goosebumps had he not already. They stared at one another as Hongbin sprinted towards the edge. Hakyeon squeezed his hand, applying a sudden pressure. Hongbin immediately straightened, went past straightening into arching his back until he was flush with Hakyeon. He thrusted, twitched, sporadically. His grip on the back of the couch was knuckle-white. Hakyeon could surely feel the pulsing under his hand. The whole silent house was audience to Hongbin reaching and toppling over the edge. Hakyeon had a relaxed kind of smile as Hongbin began to melt, then get teary eyed as Hakyeon continued to move his hand on his clothed cock.

"Stop, stop please," Hongbin whimpered. Hakyeon slowed before removing his hand entirely, returning his hand to Hongbin's hip.

Hongbin rested his head on Hakyeon's shoulder, panting and trembling. His body was trying desperately to calm down again, but he could actually feel the blood pumping through his legs, his cock, his heart. Hakyeon's hand in his hair began to rub, play with the strands delicately. Hongbin let one of his hands release the couch and drop to his lap. More appropriately, drop onto Hakyeon's lap, on the tent in his own slacks. Hakyeon made a noise, like moaning while letting go of a lip you were biting. 

"Hongbin-" 

"I want to touch it." He undid the button, pulled the zipper of Hakyeon's slacks. His hand found its way to touch his bare cock under all the clothes. Hakyeon moaned, head tilting back. "It's bigger than I imagined…"

"God, Hongbin-"

"You're wet," Hongbin mumbled, fingers rubbing over the head and feeling the pre there. Hakyeon let out a breathless laugh. 

"I have to teach you how you talk with men." 

"Not men. You," Hongbin corrected as he nosed at Hakyeon's jaw again. He wanted to bite at it, blush his skin from his ears to his shoulders. He kissed under Hakyeon's ear. "Take off your shirt."

"Yes.." Hakyeon stumbled with his buttons eventually exposing his chest. Hongbin didn't wait for him to pull out his arms, instead biting down onto his shoulder. Hakyeon's cock twitched in Hongbin's hand. Hakyeon's skin tasted like salt by now, sweat. Hongbin sucked on the skin he had caught, aroused by the idea of marking him despite his still recovering state. The idea of Hakyeon being in front of others, hiding the stain Hongbin could give him under his clothes. Danger was attractive. 

He let go of Hakyeon's skin, taking in it's dark hue on his skin. He sat up proper so he could see as he took Hakyeon's cock from his underwear, see himself pumping it. Hakyeon had become severely slouched on the couch, nearly sinking out of it. His face was red too, and Hongbin found himself in love with the shade. Hongbin's pace was quick. 

"When you first came to the hospital, you were dressed for the heat and I remember getting these thoughts about your throat, your legs."

"My cock?" Hakyeon humored. Hongbin gulped at the sound of him saying such a harsh word. Oh, if only he hadn't already come. 

"That was later…" Hakyeon did that breathless little laugh again. His eyes dropped down to Hongbin's pumping hand. His pretty lips were parted, letting him grasp and groan. "I had a dream. You.. touched me.. in the office. I woke up harder than I think I've ever been." He had hidden in the bathroom that morning, filled with a fear that he had made some kind of unconscious noise in his sleep. He had been so afraid of the thought that she had heard his subconscious betraying him. His shower was ice cold, yet he still touched himself because the imagined feeling was too much to just fight away. 

"That's a dangerous fantasy," Hakyeon muttered. 

"I thought about you when she.. wanted me." 

"Hongbin," Hakyeon said as he grabbed Hongbin's hand, pulling him forward with a light tug, "focus on me now, darling." Hongbin was quick to nod and obey. They kissed again and Hongbin focused on his hand, what he felt. Veins, the wetness, his hair. 

"Were- were your others men?"

"Yes." Hongbin let out a breath, looking away from Hakyeon's face out of shame. 

"I want- I want so much from you. I just don't know- I don't know how to do this." 

"I'll show you everything, Hongbin."

"Thank you.." Hongbin ran a free hand up Hakyeon's chest, over his pectoral. So flat, but just as soft, his nipples smaller too. Hongbin squeezed at his skin and Hakyeon whimpered. Hongbin glanced to make sure he was okay before bringing his eyes back. He pinched a nipple and it made Hakyeon's cock twitch in his palm. "You like that too?" Hongbin asked with undisguised surprise. Hakyeon laughed and closed his eyes, head back. 

"You worry me." Hongbin frowned. He glanced back down before making a choice. Hakyeon looked to Hongbin as he suddenly got up. He stood between Hakyeon's legs before getting on his knees. He pulled Hakyeon forward by his wrist, sitting him up. 

"O-oh.." Hakyeon spoke as Hongbin began to suck on his chest, his nipples. Hongbin looked so concentrated doing it, dedicated to his service. Hakyeon's nipple was sore by the time he switched. The hand pumping his cock returned along with the switch. "Hongbin-" he released Hakyeon's chest, just to do the least expected. He pulled back a little and let a drop of spit fall from his mouth to Hakyeon's cock, rubbing it in with his hand. Hakyeon moaned unabashedly, thighs trying to twitch shut around Hongbin. He looked up at Hakyeon. 

"Is that good?"

"I'm going to get it on your face if you keep going." 

"That's all well with me." Hakyeon tipped his head back with a groan. Good lord in heaven. Hongbin picked up the pace, watching himself do it. He brought another hand to gently play with the balls. He would get in as many sensations as possible, for the curse of if this was just another dream. Hakyeon was thrusting along with him, like he did when his lap was full of Hongbin. He called for Hongbin incessantly under his breath. A whispered chant that drove Hongbin insane.

"Please, do it. Get us both dirty." 

"Hongbin."

"I've wanted it for so long. Please, please just-"

"Fuck, Hongbin!" He came on Hongbin's hands, his fingers, some even landing on his clothes. Hongbin was wide eyed, never getting to see it like this. He continued to pump his hand, seeing the cum gather in the circular shape of his hand. Hongbin took his hand away, playing with what gathered. Hakyeon was panting.

"Give me just a moment." Hongbin turned, pulling a tissue from the box of the table and wiping off his hand. He pulled another to clean off Hakyeon, who drew a sharp breath when Hongbin touched him. "You don't have to," he protested. Hongbin ignored him, going to throw both away. 

He stopped on his way back, standing in the kitchen doorway. Hakyeon was fixing himself back up, underwear and pants readjusted, shirt buttons getting redone. His face was still dark with flush and his hair was a mess, especially the back. 

"What is it?" Hakyeon spoke, feeling Hongbin's eyes on him. Hongbin chewed on his lip. 

"You're beautiful." Hakyeon shook his head, smiling. 

"I'm a mess." 

"Would you- would you like to eat with me?"

* * *

“Is it.. Wrong that i have this urge to say i love you?” Hongbin spoke, picking at Hakyeon's shirt. He hummed thoughtfully, neither disagreeing or agreeing. 

“I assume you told that to your wife often?”

“Yes, but you’re not her.”

“Still, a dog is hard to break from training, so to speak.” Hongbin sighed. He felt so exhausted, yet wide awake. It was his feelings that were overworked. The guilt of his wife leaving, the shame of confessing, the… ecstasy of what followed that. 

Hakyeon did not fight staying the night. He didn't say anything about being brought to the bedroom, outside of a little teasing look. After that though, that energy fell apart. He stood in the doorway as Hongbin looked at their bed, now his bed. The sheets, the blankets, they were all still the same. They still had the smell of her soap, her perfume, stuck to them. Hongbin never considered changing them, never even noticed it until now. He went to just change the comforter, but then he caught that smell, felt the impressions in the bed from where they always laid. He striped the bed of everything with a certain taste of guilty wrath. The bedding gathered in a pile on the floor. Hongbin was blind to how sharp his movements were until he felt arms loop around his waist, hakyeon pressing his chest to Hongbin’s back. He froze, breath a touch hard.

“Hongbin,” Hakyeon said it so softly, his warm palms pressing to Hongbin’s chest. Hongbin sighed deeply. He gulped as he pet Hakyeon’s hands. 

“I'm sorry. You shouldn’t have seen that.”

“Are you okay?” Hongbin nodded biting his lip.

“Yes, yes, I’m okay. I just- it reminded me of her.”

“Are you angry at her now?” 

“No, I'm- I don't know. I don’t you seeing all of the- the  _ her _ in this house.” Hongbin ran a hand over his face, sighing again. “I sound insane, don’t I?” Hakyeon let go of him, guiding him to sit down on the edge of the bare bed. He sat beside Hongbin, wrapping arms around him and pulling him to rest on his chest. Hongbin could faintly hear his heartbeat. 

“Not insane, grieving.”

“You make it sound as though she died.” 

“Your relationship to one another did, did it not?” Hongbin didn’t answer. He was right. Hakyeon pet his head with those gentle hands, and hakyeon was reminded of a mother comforting her boy. “You’re bound to carry a lot of pain. Your guilt about your feelings for me, of a long relationship failing in other people’s eyes.”

“You’re very astute.” Hakyeon hummed, amused.

“Just understanding.”

They fixed the bed, putting on new bedding from the clean laundry. The only smell it carried was of the soap all the laundry had. Hongbin thought he would only see Hakyeon when enveloped by them. He gave pajamas to Hakyeon. He went red when Hakyeon chuckled at him turning away bashfully. Despite everything that had happened on the couch, the idea of seeing Hakyeon naked still made his ears go red. Hakyeon was not so chaste when Hongbin (painfully) changed from his filthy pants and underwear to his own shorts.

“You have such a nice backside,” He cooed, almost dreamily. Hongbin’s mouth formed a hard line, him clearing his throat.

“Hakyeon.” He laughed at Hongbin’s flustered response.

They laid together on the bed, facing one another. Hongbin felt exceptionally bashful at Hakyeon’s hands on his face, brushing his features gently. Delicate fingers over his nose, cheekbones, eyes. Hakyeon felt so warm, where Hongbin’s hands were on his sides. Hongbin couldn’t get over how firm his body was. Not in a muscular way, but in a thin way. You had to have some strength in medicine, but most of that would be in your arms. And Hongbin could definitely say Hakyeon had strong, handsome arms. When he would roll his sleeves, or dress for the heat… 

“Could i tempt you to tell me exactly what those dreams about me were?” It was so odd, to recognize tones Hongbin would use be used on him. It was that voice all men had, tempting something sexual. Hongbin awkwardly pat Hakyeon’s side.

“I don’t think I could be… decent after explaining them to you.” Hakyeon chuckled, shaking his head. Hongbin held his breath as he leaned forward and tucked his nose under Hongbin’s jaw. He kissed there sweetly and it made Hongbin’s skin break out in gooseflesh. 

“Yes, im sure you’re very tired by now.” Hongbin huffed.

“Don’t imply i have no stamina.” Hakyeon barked, laughing. He held Hongbin’s cheek so that he could kiss him.

“You are so delightful, Hongbin.” Hongbin cleared his throat. He had a sense he would be doing that often with how Hakyeon made him feel. 

“Thank you.”

“You know,” Hakyeon had a playful smile, “when i had my own fantasies, i didn’t imagine you to be so bashful.” 

“You think of me?”

“Hongbin, if i didn’t, i wouldn’t have let that kiss go any further.” Hongbin huffed at the teasing. He was never one to easily take being teased. Hakyeon didn’t make him angry though. His teasing made Hongbin’s inside turn round in a manner Hongbin shamefully liked. He put his face in Hakyeon’s neck, choosing not to respond to his words. There was still that sharp masculine smell of product on him, though it was dulled with the earthiness of old sweat. Hongbin breathed him deeply. Was this how he smelled to him? Did Hakyeon like it as much as Hongbin did?

“I did fantasize about you. Your smile, how handsome you look serious and concentrated, your hands." He took Hongbin's wrist and kissed it. "I always wanted to hold them."

"You can." Hakyeon hummed and kissed Hongbin's palm. Hongbin didn't expect something so little to feel so big. 

"I'm very grateful my working here brought us to this."

"I never expected for you to know."

"I never expected you to be attracted to me."

"Who wouldn't be?" Hongbin asked sincerely, making Hakyeon smile. 

"You're sweet."

"Its true! You're very…" he glanced at Hakyeon's body, tongue tied for the right word, "nice." 

"Only nice?" Hakyeon raised an eyebrow. 

"And beautiful.”

“And?” Hakyeon pushed. Hongbin pinched his cheek.

“Don’t fish for praise.”

“Ohh, so mean,” Hakyeon whined sarcastically. Hongbin couldn’t help cracking a smile. He bashfully hid it by cuddling into Hakyeon again. 

**Author's Note:**

> contact Info:  
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> 


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